on my way

03 November 2006

Sigh, it looks like you misunderstood our values. Let me liken it to a BGR.
If there is this boy who will love you unconditionally, for who you are, not for what you have, you have a choice. First, let me just iterate that you could obviously love this guy because, well, he just seems completely perfect. You can accept his love and live a potentially more fulfilling and wonderful life. Or you can reject him because you do not like his circumstances like his friends (who adore him) and his beliefs, and continue living life as usual.

If this entry is not meant for you, forget about reading it, you will get very confused.

Now, let me add something. Imagine that you are now dying from leukaemia (IMAGINE, I am not cursing you in case anyone tries to old "how could you condemn others" trick). That boy, bless his heart, has a blood type that matches yours. So he can donate his bone marrow to you. But just a few months ago, when you rejected him, you told him that you hated him and everything he did disgusted you. You probably did not mean it, but what has been said has been said, and that got him off your back. So now, you can either continue dying in pride, or admit to him that you need his bone marrow.

Now, let us say you do not want to die and ask him to help you out nicely. Of course, being a nice boy, he accepts even though you must have hurt him very badly. And even after you do undergo a transplant, he does not press you to love him in return. All you had to do was accept his love - in the form of bone marrow - and you would live on for many years to come.

He loves you from beginning to end. But you will die if you do not let that love affect you.

And that is my analogy. Yes, fuck me (not literally), but that IS what the curse of mankind and redemption which started at the C-place is all about. If you preserve the status quo and believe that you are still loved, well guess what, you are! Hooray. But as long as you do not ACCEPT that love, leukaemia will still get you.

We live in a terrible, broken down world. Everyone has a dark side to them, including me. I made that obvious quite recently...
The thing is, when a person makes mistakes in the name of another... it only means that that person is wrong. And even so, you cannot blame his ignorance on others who also do things in the name of that another. The human heart is deceitful above all things...

11:45 pm