on my way

28 October 2007

This bit is about Lynette:

L - long hair... kind of
Y - yellow skin (like all Chinese)
N - needs oxygen
E - eats prata with cheese sausage
T - talks to people
T - takes bus to school
E - expects me to post something less brainless than this

Hahahahaha sorry Lynette, it's 2.40am right now and my mind is blank. I was trying my best to stay awake during service and still only managed to keep one eye open, ok? And I'm posting with crap English today, so don't be disappointed... hehe.

That aside, I want a fresh start. I know roughly what direction I want to move towards. Obviously there will be people who will make this difficult, but I can't expect conditions to be perfect before I make a move can I? I don't know what to think now actually. Don't know who to believe, don't know who to trust, don't know what the heck is going on inside the minds of those around me, don't know what is expected of myself, don't know what people are trying to do to me.

Read the following paragraphs with this knowledge in mind: I am not shooting anyone. These are just the thoughts that ran through my mind today. If you don't feel me, comment like you don't.

To be honest, I thought I was just following what people were already doing. I guess everyone was waiting for some lone sheep to pounce on and tear apart, for me to make a mistake so I would be the one clearing up the mess they made. Everyone. I don't mean just dancers. Lynette said something about me being nice to bully. Don't worry, I'm not that easily offended. I think it just connects with what I'm trying to say.

Yeah... Anyone of you out there, from TKPS to TMS to TP, from 4V to ADM to TPDE, can argue your butt off about this with me, but this is what I feel. It's not even an opinion. It's a feeling. And know this... you're not obliged to make me change the way I feel. Should you be offended, it makes no difference if you try to screw up my life either, because that's already been done.

Tried to tell you all what's going on, but apparently it ain't gonna work. The words I get only apply to me, because I'm the only imperfect one. Another feeling.

By now, you the reader must be sufficiently provoked. Thus I implore you to:
1. Sit down
2. Think about it
Yeah. I'm not trying to be sarcastic. I guess that covers everything.

I guess I'll just go with the flow... just dance.
Gin used a nice song for warmup today.
Gonna donate blood tomorrow. Hope I don't feel funny on Monday.

Now Playing: Mario - Crying Out For Me

1 2 3 4
Yeah (uh huh)
Polow da Don
Listen girl
Mario, let’s go
Ladies...

It’s like you caught up in a maze
You keep on going in circles girl you’re trying to find your way out
But its time I put on my cape and
Put that "S" on my chest
Girl I wanna come and save you
But I’m stuck in the middle of seeing you hurt
I know when you love him
And you wanna make it work
And I can’t help but think that I known you first
It’s getting louder girl
Can’t ignore it no more

I can hear your heart crying out for me (crying out for me)
I can hear your heart crying out for me

(And it keeps on saying) Come on in, come on in come on in and save me
(And it keeps on saying) Come on in, come on in come on in and save me
I can hear your heart crying out for me

Baby, I should’ve never caught no feeling
But baby, having late night conversations on your sofa
You telling me how he played you out over and over, over and over
But I’m stuck in the middle of seeing you hurt
I know when you love him
And you wanna make it work
And I can’t help but think that I knew you first
It’s getting louder
Girl I can’t ignore it no more baby

I can hear your heart crying out for me (crying out for me)
I can hear your heart crying out for me

(And girl it’s saying) Come on in, come on in, come on in and save me
Come on in, come on in, come on in and save me
I can hear your heart crying out for me

2:24 am